Pregnant from one night stand - PLZ HELP?

Hi, I have a huge problem and I am not looking for solutions on Y Answers, just maybe some ideas. My girlfriends and I went to Sandals in the Bahamas to have a girls-only no husbands/no kids end of summer vacation a few weeks ago. We went drinking and dancing, and I was really really stupid and met a man who worked there and got intimate with him. Now a few weeks later, I am totally late and took a home pregnancy test and it was positive. Worse still, my husband saw I had an ept test and knows that I am pregnant and he thinks the baby is his.



I have not been intimate with my husband since my last period, and I am positive that it is from this other man. I am white and the other man is black. My conscience will not let me have an abortion, but I have two little girls that I love dearly and do not know what to do...Pregnant from one night stand - PLZ HELP?Oh dear, so if abortion is out you're going to have to tell your husband. From there you'll both have to make the decision as to whether or not you're going to keep the baby. I'm sure it's going to be the hardest thing in the world to tell him but it has to be done, even if the baby wasn't going to be half black. It's the right thing to do. Good luck.Pregnant from one night stand - PLZ HELP?
What you do is this, you tell your husband what happened, you go through with your pregnancy, have the baby, then give it up for adoption.



You may have to tell everyone that the baby died.



The alternative is shame, and your husband leaving you, combined with the shock of the rest of your family, the embarrassment to your other children as they grow up.



I hope it was worth the few minutes of fun you may have had.Pregnant from one night stand - PLZ HELP?As much as people are going to hate to hear this but I think if you think you can live with the guilt and not tell your husband for the sake of your family, you need to have an abortion. You can do it medically and say you had a miscarriage. If you think you can tell your husband then do that but you cant wait to see if this baby comes out black.



good luck
Dont feel stupid or dumb because that is not true. I amin the same situation I am pregnant with twins and had sex with one other boy one time (although he did not ejaculate in me)the month I got pregnant and scared that one of the fraternal twins maybe his. Although the chances are slim its still scary. Just dont stress and know that at the end of the day that is YOUR CHILD no matter who the dad is. Good luck and don't stress just thik ur child has you even if they have no one else!!!Pregnant from one night stand - PLZ HELP?Well. You're pretty much screwed. Unless your husband is some kind of saint thats going to say "its ok that you went and had sex with a random dude while youre away, i forgive you and ill raise his baby with you". . . which i doubt. Why would you do this? I tend to believe that this has to be a made up story because I don't think anyone can be this inconsiderate, idiotic, and just plain slutty. Good luck explaining a black baby. Quit sleeping around. Pregnant from one night stand - PLZ HELP?
You have to tell him

or get an abortion ( sad, but you might have to )

And say you had a misscarrage or something.

the best thing is to, tell him!

you know, he will probably never trust you

ever again, i mean like when you go out

or on a vacation with your girls, he wont

trust you. you screwed it up. and you should

never ever blame alcohol on your actions.

sure you were drunk. but thats no excuse.
Wow, you have no option but to tell your husband. You made a dumb mistake %26amp; now you have to face the consequences. Good luck.Pregnant from one night stand - PLZ HELP?
dumb dumb dumb! what in the world were you thinking? you'll just have to tell him. that's the only way. he's going to know it's not his kid when you deliver a BLACK baby!
Well you might lose his trust for you. Talk him into an abortion?
The simplest, most difficult answer is the right answer in this case. You made a huge mistake, and it doesn't seem like you're making any excuses for it. You absolutely must tell your husband. Even if you believed that abortion was an option, you would still be lying about something so serious that your relationship would probably collapse anyway. Send your girls to a relatives/friend's house for the night, and tell your husband the whole truth. If you can't do it in person, write him a letter and let him read it with you there to talk to when he's done. No matter how he feels about you after this, he will still love your two little girls just as much as he always has. This will likely be more difficult and hurt more than anything you've ever gone through before, but knowing that you did your best to do the right thing in a bad situation will be what allows you to sleep at night. Guilt can ruin any future happy moments you may have. Even if you could make the baby disappear, you would know what you had done every time you look at your husband. If you're honest, it opens the door to experiencing happiness without guilt. Whatever you decide to do, my heart goes out to you and your family. Life is never easy, and it's what we do with our mistakes that defines us.
If you haven't been intimate with your husband since your last period, is there a chance he already suspects anything?

Even if not, at this point you really do need to tell him what happened. I know it's SUPER hard, but other couples have come through it, too. You may want to look into marriage counseling to save your marriage, depending on how things go.

I'm glad you're not considering abortion, and while it would be difficult, this child very well could become part of your family just as much as your two daughters. A lot depends on your husband's reaction when you tell him what happened.



When you tell him, don't argue and do expect him to be angry for a while. Just let him know that it was a stupid decision influenced by alcohol and that you are very sorry and want to be with him only and work with him to save your marriage. Be patient while he deals with the news, and I'd recommend that neither of you make any decision about the baby until after you are calm and can think and talk about what to do.



Things like this happen, and I'm sorry you've got some rough decisions to make.


Wow, I don't even know what to say! You are in serious trouble and it's completely your fault. You should tell your husband about your "affair" or else your conscience will never let you live in peace. You have to be responsible for your deeds. It's a real shame that there are wives like you, no wonder why men think almost every woman is a whore these days. Be honest at least! Lies completely ruin marriages and the truth about these things always come out. At least your husband would appreciate your honesty but if he finds out about this on his own...well, that can't have a happy ending. You can still make it right by being honest. If you lie once, be prepared to lie again and again and that's no life anymore...
thats bad

i would leave your husband.

you must not be content with him

if you love him you will tell him.

right now he is getting all excited about his new baby coming into this world and the longer you wait then harder it will be for him when he finds out. right now your world is a lie.

sure theres a chance the baby is you husbands but still since you believe it isnt and it might not be you dont want to wait until after you have that baby for him to realize its not his.

you must break it to him, maybe he'll forgive you and you can stay together but really if you cheated on him once what stops you from doing it again?

consider you options.

you know what you have to do.

you just need the courage to do it.

maybe contact the father?

its not fair that you bring his baby into this life and he wont know it?

its your decision

i hope you make the right choices





also your baby will be white at birth. it wont be a couple of days/weeks b4 its color comes in
I do not have any good advice but I read your question and had to at least say something. I can't imagine being in the situation you are in and can only wish you the best. I personally have terminated a pregnancy before so I unfortunately may decide that if I were in your shoes (that makes me sound like a horrible person), but the only thing you can really do is confess to what happened and go from there. Good luck to you and I hope everything turns out for the best.



Add - I see a lot of people are being pretty harsh...mistakes happen and unfortunately this one isn't one that you can just forget about that easily. You, along with a million other people in this country, cheated on your spouse and its something you have to take responsibility for. Again, good luck to you.
You have to tell him and hope for the best. Don't end up on Maury getting paternity results. lol sorry. I couldn't help it. But you really do have to tell him. Hopefully he'll be understanding if you try to explain that you made a huge mistake and you were just swept up in the vacation frame of mind. You know what I'm saying? You go to a tropical place like that and your whole world flips upside down and you do stupid things. I'm not saying it was ok, but maybe if you try to explain it to him that way, he'll be a little more sympathetic. Good luck.