why would you stop seeing him? why wouldn't you just try and make it work to a relationship? he is bound to feel something for you after two yearsGuys, Help!! I feel I've shattered to pieces. Had a one-night stand and now, I am hurting like crazy...?maybe both of you were just horny sex is not really as bad as it used to be for me it's considred like a movie or date at a park... blah don't worry just talk to the guy
DAT'S ALL DAT HE WANTED TO DO ANYWAY... DAT WAS A LONG DiSTANCE BOOTY CALL... U SHOULD JUST OVER iT N FiND SOMEONE WHO FEELS THE SAME ABOUT HAViNG SEX... GOOD LUCK!...Guys, Help!! I feel I've shattered to pieces. Had a one-night stand and now, I am hurting like crazy...?This is the flaw in your thinking. Look sex does not = a relationship. It is just sex. You did share something special. It isn't like you have sex with every man you talk to but you don't have to put so much meaning into the fact that you did have sex. You can continue to see him and have fun with him and not expect anything more than that. It is a choice you make.Guys, Help!! I feel I've shattered to pieces. Had a one-night stand and now, I am hurting like crazy...?
If you don't want to get hurt you shouldn't have sex on the third date.... It takes longer than that to have an actuall relationship.... Sorry you got hurt but maybe you could learn from it......
Well, the first step is to acknowledge that the relationship you broke off is not a one night stand, at least it was not to you. You had a 2 year relationship with this guy and the one time you made love with him was all a part of that long term relationship. So the first thing I would say to you is that it is OKAY to feel depressed and hurt after ending this relationship because you just ended a 2 year relationship. No one would expect you to rebound from that immediately.
As for fixing the problem, the only thing that will fix that is time. Time to let yourself heal, time to recover from being rejected (yes rejected, you may have broke it off but only because he didn't want to commit to what you needed, which is why you FEEL that rejection), and time to learn from this experience and move on with your life. Let yourself cry, drown yourself in ice cream and friends and old DVDs, whatever it is that makes you comfortable and happy.
Then pick yourself up and start working on yourself. Whether that is investing in your friendships or learning photography or doing charity work. Keep yourself busy and your mind on other things and over time you will feel less and less of a sting from this hurt until one day you realize without noticing it that you are thinking more about how cute that guy is over there than about how much this idiot hurt you. And then you will be ready to move on.
But first and foremost, it is OK to be hurt right now, just work on overcoming it and always remember that things will be better, and it will come sooner than you think. And please don't go back to him until/if he is willing to offer what you need from the relationship. Don't try to be friends or "just chat" that will only extend the pain of what you are feeling now. AFTER you get over it you can go back to be "just friends" for now you need to repair the hurt you are feeling, trying to become "just friends" now would only keep tearing the wound open and make it much harder to move on.Guys, Help!! I feel I've shattered to pieces. Had a one-night stand and now, I am hurting like crazy...?
Excellent Answer from JC in SC - He hit alot of great pointers.
To add to that, let yourself experience the pain. Learn from it %26amp; put it all behind you. Do things for yourself that build your confidence - make more friends, explore your hobbies, do some new things (volunteer work, etc.). Some day, you will meet that great person. Be optimistic, keep your spirits up %26amp; don't let this experience discourage you in the future.
For next time, you might want to hold off the sex to prevent yourself from being hurt again. A guy that is crazy about you will respect you for that.
Hi Trey S,
Wow, where to start? Well, first I don't see it as a 1 night stand since you have known this guy for a while in some manor. Keep in mind Cyber anything is totaly different than reality! I feel I need to ask you some Q's that you only NEED to answer to yourself! When you met in person, I would think you must have felt some physical/sexual atraction. Are you confusing love and just sex? Even great sex, is just that and not love. How can you be sure he ment what he said about not being ready? That could be a defensive or even a testing comment. You can't know unless you chat on-line or by phone. Don't be a push over or put all you eggs in ONE basket. Let him know how you feel and how he MAKES you feel. From this you may get some insight if he is a MAN or a BOY! One thing I have found is that if you look to hard for something you start forcing thoughts and lying to yourself. Not good!! Maybe, just a thought, if you in a suptle way just make him aware you are OUT there looking, playing the feild. That some day you know you'll find that special ONE. Until then you will have fun and satisfy your sexual needs as you desire. To me "making love" is simply sex along with special and deep feelings for that person. Are you certain you were not caught up in the moment of the (cyber) adventure coming to life and that you have clearly defined/seperated feelings of love from lust? Since I don't know how old you are or how much experience you have had in relationships or in experimenting with sex.............well there are just so many varriables. I don't know if this halps you? I hope it gives you some food for thought. Feel free to contact me if you want. Cheer up!!! Life is an adventure and a never ending learnig experience. Explore, learn, grow, and have a BLAST doing it all! Best wishes, Bye
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