Why do I keep going for one-night stands and dating that is destined to fail with women?

Obviously it is vapid, shallow, pig-like, etc. Normally one could sum the answer to this up and say "you fear committment". However, I have had long term relationships in the past and never had any uncontrollable fear of committment. Yes, marriage entered my mind quite often while in those relationships.

Now, for some reason, it just feels really good to have sex with multiple, random women and not do any kind of long term dating. I feel like I am going the opposite way I am supposed to go as I get older. Yet, I still continue because it feels so good.

Some more details: I work all the time, have a great family and supportive friends, am quite social (obviously) and was never abused.

I just don't understand why I can't "outgrow" this twentysomething behavior (I am 31 now).

Is this just a normal "guy" thing and I am just following my nature genetics or am I destined to be way for the rest of my life? Perhaps I have never really loved someone and this is the issue......??Why do I keep going for one-night stands and dating that is destined to fail with women?My dear, the way that I see it you seem like a "deprived" person in the area of self expression. SO you say, you have a great family and supportive friends. And that you are a social person. Have you ever behaved that way sexually when you were still in your teens?.. or even while you were in your early twenties?



As to the relationships that you had in the past, Perhaps you have honestly loved at least one of them. I think that is not the issue. May be you're still in love with one, but something's pulling you back. Just a thought in your mind is quite different from actually doing it. You are not scared of the thought of commitment, but the actual practice of it, I am sorry to say that you still lack it. Who knows, you may have already found her but you just do not realize it?



It is hard to answer your questions outright because it needs details to be understood. But the way I see it, going for one-night stands is your way of dealing with your self expression. These women are strangers and you pay them for pleasure, so you get to "say" everything and that they will just have to follow. The way I see it, there are things that you want to be done your way and perhaps sometime in the past, things did not happen the way that you wanted them to happen that is why you vent your frustration on a "safe" avenue where you can easily get away with - your sexual activities with multiple women. So you say, it must feel really good. I am sure you are not scared of STDs and AIDS because you're just having fun, right? But what happens when pleasure is over? That, you have to deal with again, and the cycle continues. See, for as long as the root cause is not properly dealt with, this will go on and on and on with your life. This is not a normal guy thing. I suggest you seek professional help about it.



You've asked this question because you feel that something is not right somewhere. Congratulations, that is a good start.Why do I keep going for one-night stands and dating that is destined to fail with women?you just have not found the right one yet. Once you do, you will want to settle in with them. Dont rush it, but be careful you dont get some nasty disease that could ruin everything for you !Why do I keep going for one-night stands and dating that is destined to fail with women?a new relationship gives a person a HIGH .... like all highs this too is addictive ..... dats y u cant quit ......



u need to seek helpWhy do I keep going for one-night stands and dating that is destined to fail with women?
I am also 31 and have been married since i was 24 so i cant relate to your problem but i have a friend (female) that sounds very much like you. Perhaps you should meet.



Dont settle down til you are ready as it will only end in hurt if you act in the way that you think society wants you to.



Have fun. Be safe and honest.